Ian Andrew Mallon

The first time I saw Ian was on an ultrasound machine after three days of labor. I took one look at his huge head trying to get into the narrow birth canal and I thought, “oh no, that’s not gonna work”. A few hours later, in the middle of cesarean surgery, I looked up at the doctor and he was literally moving Ian’s head from side to side trying to get his large shoulders out of my body. Ian Andrew Mallon aka I AM was born on February 27, 1991. Ian was three weeks late. My mother and I took advantage of the time he gave us and had a lovely dinner for my birthday on the 25th and checked into the hospital the next day.

The maternity ward had its own little nursery attached. I could hear the babies mewing. Not my boy. He wailed!! At ten pounds Ian was literally head and shoulders bigger than his compatriots. Ian was loud and vocal even then. He wailed all his life, in the rugby scrums, in his elementary plays, on his musical instruments. Ian let himself be heard. He also heard you! Now often the way he heard me was to say ‘ok’ and ‘uh huh’ and ‘alright mama I love you’. Then he would do exactly what he wanted to do. We lived in Portland during his elementary years. By second grade, if I wasn’t there to get Ian before the bell rang, he was off to a friends house. There were hours of angst not knowing where my little boy was. He would come skipping in and say ‘I was just at Marks (Billy, Jesse etc.) house, it's just down the street’. Even then he was a great friend.

This kid had character. He had the greatest expressions and faces and was up for anything, always engaged in life. His Irish cousin (Eileen) often by his side. He adored his grandmother and taught her how to love. He doted on her so!! Hugging and giving. She adored him, and he was her greatest blessing. In middle school, Ian joined the band and his first instrument was the upright bass. I was so taken by this gutsy boy in a suit, playing this bass bigger than he was. That was Ian, he took on the world one note at a time. He would sit at the piano and move his hands over the keys and play the most beautiful pieces from his heart. He loved, he played, he dreamed out loud.

He lived with his father after middle school and chose a performing arts school. Of course the dancers were smitten. He was charming, attentive, sensitive, and very cute. His musicality improved with his expressiveness and gregariousness. He spent a few years with his Uncle Dan and Aunt Leigha for highschool, and became the older brother to their children, so cool with his long hair and rock-n-roll band. They adored him, and he loved them. They were always a second family. Leigha taught him French, then he learned Spanish, and Italian. He was gifted and had a feel for languages (though his translations were occasionally unintelligible after a few beers).

When Ian returned to Albuquerque he found a true love, Rugby. This started life long friendships that are alive today. Not only that, but he pushed so many friends into Rugby that still say it was the best thing that ever happened to them. Ian graduated from the Performing Arts school in Tempe and went on to ASU. He majored in fraternity, with a double minor in Rugby and parties. He did manage to complete his junior year in business school before hitting the road to develop his greatest skill, sales!!

I knew Ian was an incredible salesman when his brother was trying to sell football fundraising tickets to a bunch of bikers, I mean like the hells angels variety. We were in a restaurant and Ian walked over, cool as could be and he had a whole new group of friends in a minute. I was amazed watching my very comfortable and brave son sell all these football tickets just as smooth as silk. He was amazing, so comfortable within himself. He sold books for a few summers and his sales skills grew exponentially. I never knew anyone as comfortable around people. He was a consummate friend, and never forgot a single one. What his greatest joy was though, was his brother.

Ian started well… demanding that he have a baby brother. He really wanted someone to play with. Right after Ian turned eight, Jason was born. Ian was in love. Of course, he made it clear that this baby was too young and he should have come years earlier so he had more time to play. Jason was the light of Ian’s life no matter what. It was the three of us. Jason adored Ian, loved him more than anyone. They could be hard on each other, but never were they very far apart if they could help it. Jason and I moved to Phoenix to be closer to Ian. His frat brothers couldn’t have all the fun and, I was a little concerned about a ‘fraternity major’ (rightly so, as Ian partied hard). He was the life of the party and often the instigator. He made it fun. Sometimes to his detriment. Yet he never stopped being a friend to so many.

Savannah was born a year and a half after Sage. Ian fell in love with his children, deeply. Everything he did was for them. Fourteen hours a day. So hard on a young marriage with young kids. It was hellish, especially on a young family waiting for his time. He worked hard, incurred a ridiculous amount of tickets on the road and became overwhelmed with expenses even with the amazing salary. It took its toll on the marriage and the struggle to pay for everything. In many ways my amazing boy was buried. There was the common mistake of too high interest on cars that were barely affordable and the cost of children. The divorce came hard and not having his children with him was even harder.

Still he was always amazing. He had gusto that was irreplaceable. So smart, so talented, so buried in debt, so young. Ian partied hard and continued to create communities around him wherever he went. Rugby, the fraternity brothers he still kept up with, new friends, new adventures. He was hired at Amazon after the start of Covid and the custom suit business bottoming out. He was befriended by the Oakland harbor community and started boating and loved it. He bought a boat from his amazing mentor for a generous price and learned to clean and repair boats. He was deeply loved in this community as well. He was joined by his girlfriend and they embraced the area.

Still the relationship itself was very challenging even with an intense love. Ian loved hard and at times loved with the help of a little too much alcohol. Ian was an incredibly loving person, however sometimes love isn’t enough to meet all the challenges of a relationship, or life’s hardships. Ian died February 22, 2021. Five days before his 30th birthday.